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Patch
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    April fools thread

    NebulaJack
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    Post by NebulaJack Thu Apr 21, 2016 9:21 pm

    I got paid yesterday and deposited my check in the bank. Tonight, after getting home from work, I got started on paying utility bills by phone, which I normally do at the beginning of the month. I was short at the beginning of the month, so I called the electric/water company and my ISP to let them know I'd pay on the 21st. So I call and go through the automated payment robot with E-web (the water/power company) and get that sorted.

    Then I get the autobot for comcast on the line, but it won't accept my payment. I keep getting an error message that my card's been declined. I log onto my banks's website, and GOD DAMNIT! I was going through the motions so quick that I accidentally paid the past due, and the current bill which just generated but isn't due til the beginning of May! FUCK! That leaves 11 bucks in my account, and it's past 5 so their customer services isn't available until tomorrow morning, and I don't even know if they'll be able to do anything.


    GODDAMNIT!

    Otherwise it was an okay day.
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    Post by rkwsuperstar Thu Apr 21, 2016 3:20 pm

    rkwsuperstar wrote:Doc appt ok.  Cast off.  Fingers/hand/wrist are swollen and stiff.  Can barely move, got some exercises to help.  No more leg brace.  Gotta start putting weight on leg to build up strength in knee.  Off work 4 more weeks.  Mainly, I think its to help me.  I can't be home alone, still, and I work an hour from my parents.

    oh, and to make sure i gross y'all out, my hand and arm are shedding skin at an alarming rate. it's like snow. i look like a scaly lizard and i've scrubbed it twice.
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    Post by rkwsuperstar Thu Apr 21, 2016 3:17 pm

    Doc appt ok. Cast off. Fingers/hand/wrist are swollen and stiff. Can barely move, got some exercises to help. No more leg brace. Gotta start putting weight on leg to build up strength in knee. Off work 4 more weeks. Mainly, I think its to help me. I can't be home alone, still, and I work an hour from my parents.
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    Post by rkwsuperstar Thu Apr 21, 2016 3:06 pm

    James.k.Polk wrote:
    Patch wrote:I'm to the point I don't want to vote for any of them

    At this point I'll probably stay home in November and cast my vote for whiskey. If I have to choose between drinking battery acid and eating plutonium,  I think I'll opt out all together.

    What worries me about Trump is he his lack of understanding of what a president does. Most of his supporters seem not to understand it either.
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    Post by James.k.Polk Thu Apr 21, 2016 1:19 pm

    Patch wrote:I'm to the point I don't want to vote for any of them

    At this point I'll probably stay home in November and cast my vote for whiskey. If I have to choose between drinking battery acid and eating plutonium,  I think I'll opt out all together.
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    Post by James.k.Polk Thu Apr 21, 2016 1:19 pm

    Patch wrote:I'm to the point I don't want to vote for any of them

    At this point I'll probably stay home in November and cast my vote for whiskey. If I have to choose between drinking battery acid and eating plutonium, I think I'll opt out all together.
    Patch
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    Post by Patch Thu Apr 21, 2016 12:25 pm

    I'm to the point I don't want to vote for any of them
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    Post by James.k.Polk Thu Apr 21, 2016 10:23 am

    Patch wrote:Hillary is on GMA this morning for a town hall. I'm surprised Snuffleupagus isn't rubbing her feet while he's interviewing her.

    They had Cruz on a few days back and he was hit with a gay republican question about gay support. A fair question, which he bumbled around and didn't answer. Then he had an angry black man accusing the south of sending guns to poor blacks in New York. It was stupid. Cruz bumbled his way through that one as well. He got a couple of soft ball questions, but not many.

    So far Hillary has been asked to release her Wall Street transcripts, which she said she won't do unless everyone has to do something similar. She was asked about the 1994 crime bill, which she said it was a good question twice, and said she won't lock up people for smaller crimes. If your car gets broken into and your wallet and phone are stolen, it's not a small crime to you. Yes you could not leave stuff in your car, but people shouldn't be breaking into cars either. We have seen a big rise in this kind of crime around here as the meth heads from the next town over have started breaking in or flat out stealing cars.

    Asked if she's trustworthy, she said shes not a natural politician. Greatest regret? Supporting Bush in Iraq. Bernie fan asking about weed? No answer, beyond she will look at it. Women pay gap? change the laws so people can find out if they are getting paid less. Once the company sees they are paying less they will do the right thing. Really? Do you think they don't know they are paying less?
    Which SNL impersonator does her best? She can't pick. Oh and shes not a natural politician again. She likes to get things done. Which hot sauce does she like? I won't bother to tell you which, because who gives a shit. Bills annoying habit? reading before he goes to sleep and leaving the light on. I guess his whoring around days are behind him, or that may have been the answer.

    I'm not bashing Hillary, GMA is in her pocket, so she should get preferential treatment, and she did. My thoughts on Hillary is she really wants to help the people who are unable to help themselves. I think that in doing so she lumps in many groups that may not necessarily need that help, creating a system where the needs of the few outweigh the need of the many. It's not realistic.

    I dislike her enough to vote for Trump. That's how much I dislike her.








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    Post by James.k.Polk Thu Apr 21, 2016 10:21 am

    theIllustriousDrGonzo wrote:
    Patch wrote:
    James.k.Polk wrote:

    My bed is something I bought at an outlet place that no longer exists. I added a 3 inch memory foam topper but I feel like it's time to graduate to a grown ups bed.

    I'm getting soft in this happily married life. I never even noticed what type of bed I slept on before. If it was hard or soft, it was what it was. Now my wife buys me shirts and say "Isn't that soft?" Who knew that was even a thing.
    Now I like my soft shirts, and comfy beds.

    I may have to sell all my guns and open a booth at a farmers market selling hand painted horseshoes, or whatever sissified guys do with their free time.

    You've let a woman rob you of your MANHOOD.

    Also, you'll have to ask Polk what sissified guys do with their free time.

    DOUBLE BURN!!

    Sleestaks. We draw Sleestaks.
    Patch
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    Post by Patch Thu Apr 21, 2016 9:14 am

    Hillary is on GMA this morning for a town hall. I'm surprised Snuffleupagus isn't rubbing her feet while he's interviewing her.

    They had Cruz on a few days back and he was hit with a gay republican question about gay support. A fair question, which he bumbled around and didn't answer. Then he had an angry black man accusing the south of sending guns to poor blacks in New York. It was stupid. Cruz bumbled his way through that one as well. He got a couple of soft ball questions, but not many.

    So far Hillary has been asked to release her Wall Street transcripts, which she said she won't do unless everyone has to do something similar. She was asked about the 1994 crime bill, which she said it was a good question twice, and said she won't lock up people for smaller crimes. If your car gets broken into and your wallet and phone are stolen, it's not a small crime to you. Yes you could not leave stuff in your car, but people shouldn't be breaking into cars either. We have seen a big rise in this kind of crime around here as the meth heads from the next town over have started breaking in or flat out stealing cars.

    Asked if she's trustworthy, she said shes not a natural politician. Greatest regret? Supporting Bush in Iraq. Bernie fan asking about weed? No answer, beyond she will look at it. Women pay gap? change the laws so people can find out if they are getting paid less. Once the company sees they are paying less they will do the right thing. Really? Do you think they don't know they are paying less?
    Which SNL impersonator does her best? She can't pick. Oh and shes not a natural politician again. She likes to get things done. Which hot sauce does she like? I won't bother to tell you which, because who gives a shit. Bills annoying habit? reading before he goes to sleep and leaving the light on. I guess his whoring around days are behind him, or that may have been the answer.

    I'm not bashing Hillary, GMA is in her pocket, so she should get preferential treatment, and she did. My thoughts on Hillary is she really wants to help the people who are unable to help themselves. I think that in doing so she lumps in many groups that may not necessarily need that help, creating a system where the needs of the few outweigh the need of the many. It's not realistic.








    Patch
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    Post by Patch Thu Apr 21, 2016 8:07 am

    James.k.Polk wrote:

    Oh come on.  My sleeping on an outlet store bed in real life is worse than his pretend dog bed.

    True, but you did say it was time for a new one. I know Gonzo has a hammock since it was part of his secret Santa, so I assume he lays on Timely's wigs just to feel closer to the one he loves.
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    Post by James.k.Polk Thu Apr 21, 2016 6:00 am

    theIllustriousDrGonzo wrote:
    James.k.Polk wrote:
    Patch wrote:
    theIllustriousDrGonzo wrote:
    I sleep on an old dog bed stuffed with used wigs.

    Not sure which part of that is the most disturbing.

    Oh come on.  My sleeping on an outlet store bed in real life is worse than his pretend dog bed.

    It's not pretend, old man.

    Then maybe you shouldn't spend so much on mushrooms and marijuanas.
    theIllustriousDrGonzo
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    Post by theIllustriousDrGonzo Thu Apr 21, 2016 1:27 am

    James.k.Polk wrote:
    Patch wrote:
    theIllustriousDrGonzo wrote:
    I sleep on an old dog bed stuffed with used wigs.

    Not sure which part of that is the most disturbing.

    Oh come on.  My sleeping on an outlet store bed in real life is worse than his pretend dog bed.

    It's not pretend, old man.
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    Post by James.k.Polk Wed Apr 20, 2016 11:20 pm

    Patch wrote:
    theIllustriousDrGonzo wrote:
    I sleep on an old dog bed stuffed with used wigs.

    Not sure which part of that is the most disturbing.

    Oh come on. My sleeping on an outlet store bed in real life is worse than his pretend dog bed.
    Patch
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    Post by Patch Wed Apr 20, 2016 2:32 pm

    theIllustriousDrGonzo wrote:

    You've let a woman rob you of your MANHOOD.

    Also, you'll have to ask Polk what sissified guys do with their free time.

    DOUBLE BURN!!

    She's quite a woman so I'll accept that. I did buy this pair of beauties for myself, to give me a boost of testosterone.

    April fools thread - Page 4 ILZeefq

    This is what you get if Jack Bauer and Hans Gruber have a baby together. The Stainless H&K USP compact.
    theIllustriousDrGonzo
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    Post by theIllustriousDrGonzo Wed Apr 20, 2016 2:28 pm

    Patch wrote:
    James.k.Polk wrote:

    My bed is something I bought at an outlet place that no longer exists. I added a 3 inch memory foam topper but I feel like it's time to graduate to a grown ups bed.

    I'm getting soft in this happily married life. I never even noticed what type of bed I slept on before. If it was hard or soft, it was what it was. Now my wife buys me shirts and say "Isn't that soft?" Who knew that was even a thing.
    Now I like my soft shirts, and comfy beds.

    I may have to sell all my guns and open a booth at a farmers market selling hand painted horseshoes, or whatever sissified guys do with their free time.

    You've let a woman rob you of your MANHOOD.

    Also, you'll have to ask Polk what sissified guys do with their free time.

    DOUBLE BURN!!
    Patch
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    Post by Patch Wed Apr 20, 2016 2:26 pm

    James.k.Polk wrote:

    My bed is something I bought at an outlet place that no longer exists. I added a 3 inch memory foam topper but I feel like it's time to graduate to a grown ups bed.

    I'm getting soft in this happily married life. I never even noticed what type of bed I slept on before. If it was hard or soft, it was what it was. Now my wife buys me shirts and say "Isn't that soft?" Who knew that was even a thing.
    Now I like my soft shirts, and comfy beds.

    I may have to sell all my guns and open a booth at a farmers market selling hand painted horseshoes, or whatever sissified guys do with their free time.
    theIllustriousDrGonzo
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    Post by theIllustriousDrGonzo Wed Apr 20, 2016 2:25 pm

    Patch wrote:
    theIllustriousDrGonzo wrote:
    I sleep on an old dog bed stuffed with used wigs.

    Not sure which part of that is the most disturbing.

    I get the wigs from Timely.
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    Post by Patch Wed Apr 20, 2016 2:15 pm

    theIllustriousDrGonzo wrote:
    I sleep on an old dog bed stuffed with used wigs.

    Not sure which part of that is the most disturbing.
    theIllustriousDrGonzo
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    Post by theIllustriousDrGonzo Wed Apr 20, 2016 1:20 pm

    James.k.Polk wrote:
    Patch wrote:My wife's hip has bothering her for a few months. She has been getting adjusted regularly but it kept flaring up. so we got a new mattress. We had just got a new one less than 2 years ago, but I sprung for a TEMPUR-PEDIC one.
    They run twice as much as a regular mattress and is worth every penny. We have had it a week and she already has noticed the difference. It took a couple of days to get use to it, but now I love it.

    I didn't even budge when those storms came in last night. Well worth the extra money and with 48 month no interest, I'm very happy with it.

    My bed is something I bought at an outlet place that no longer exists. I added a 3 inch memory foam topper but I feel like it's time to graduate to a grown ups bed.

    I sleep on an old dog bed stuffed with used wigs.
    James.k.Polk
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    Post by James.k.Polk Wed Apr 20, 2016 12:37 pm

    Patch wrote:My wife's hip has bothering her for a few months. She has been getting adjusted regularly but it kept flaring up. so we got a new mattress. We had just got a new one less than 2 years ago, but I sprung for a TEMPUR-PEDIC one.
    They run twice as much as a regular mattress and is worth every penny. We have had it a week and she already has noticed the difference. It took a couple of days to get use to it, but now I love it.

    I didn't even budge when those storms came in last night. Well worth the extra money and with 48 month no interest, I'm very happy with it.

    My bed is something I bought at an outlet place that no longer exists. I added a 3 inch memory foam topper but I feel like it's time to graduate to a grown ups bed.
    Patch
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    Post by Patch Wed Apr 20, 2016 7:40 am

    My wife's hip has bothering her for a few months. She has been getting adjusted regularly but it kept flaring up. so we got a new mattress. We had just got a new one less than 2 years ago, but I sprung for a TEMPUR-PEDIC one.
    They run twice as much as a regular mattress and is worth every penny. We have had it a week and she already has noticed the difference. It took a couple of days to get use to it, but now I love it.

    I didn't even budge when those storms came in last night. Well worth the extra money and with 48 month no interest, I'm very happy with it.
    theIllustriousDrGonzo
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    Post by theIllustriousDrGonzo Wed Apr 20, 2016 2:44 am

    rkwsuperstar wrote:
    James.k.Polk wrote:
    theIllustriousDrGonzo wrote:⊂_ヽ                           Guess who got stood up on a lunch date and then got drunk as hell???
       \\                  <-----ME.   GOODNIGHT.          
          \( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
               > ⌒ヽ
               /   へ\
             /  / \\
             レ ノ   ヽ_つ
          / /
          / /|
         ( (ヽ
         | |、\
          | 丿 \ ⌒)
          | |  ) /
        ノ )  Lノ
      (_/

    I still consider it a failure but i'm not upset about it.


    I'm sorry Gonzo.  For the record I did not get stood up on a date and I still wish I was drunk as hell.

    Not to be glib, but at least you had a date.  Maybe it didn't work out, but it's a step in the right direction.  

    I'm trying to find positives to keep myself up, so I'm forcing it on you guys.
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    Post by rkwsuperstar Tue Apr 19, 2016 9:42 pm

    James.k.Polk wrote:
    theIllustriousDrGonzo wrote:⊂_ヽ                           Guess who got stood up on a lunch date and then got drunk as hell???
       \\                  <-----ME.   GOODNIGHT.          
          \( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
               > ⌒ヽ
               /   へ\
             /  / \\
             レ ノ   ヽ_つ
          / /
          / /|
         ( (ヽ
         | |、\
          | 丿 \ ⌒)
          | |  ) /
        ノ )  Lノ
      (_/


    I'm sorry Gonzo.  For the record I did not get stood up on a date and I still wish I was drunk as hell.

    Not to be glib, but at least you had a date. Maybe it didn't work out, but it's a step in the right direction.

    I'm trying to find positives to keep myself up, so I'm forcing it on you guys.
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    Post by NebulaJack Tue Apr 19, 2016 9:37 pm

    James.k.Polk wrote:
    Patch wrote:Any word on if you can are going to be able to make it to the con? I just found out that the concert tickets my wife got the family at Christmas fall on that Saturday, so I'm wanting to go, but it will depend on if we are getting a hotel Saturday night or not. I'm fine with taking two cars, and heading over Sunday. Driving over Saturday, hanging out late, driving back home then doing it again Sunday sounds like a beating.

    alas, it sounds as if the comic con is going to be a solo affair for me again.

    Maybe I can con Gonzo in to coming.

    Given how tight my budget's been lately, it's not looking too likely for me either.

    Sponsored content


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